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Jokes to keep you laughing in the pool (apologies in advance)

21 September 2021

 by Angus Donald

Q: Why do squirrels swim on their back?
A: To keep their nuts dry!

Q: Why is swimming like sex?
A: When it's good, it's really, really good. And when it's's still pretty good.

Q: What kind of stroke can you use on toast?
A: BUTTER-fly!

Q: Why did the teacher jump into the water?
A: She wanted to test the water!

Q: Why did the vegetarians stop swimming?
A: They didn't like meets!

Q: What word looks the same backwards and upside down?
A: Swims

Q: How do swimmers clean themselves?
A: They wash up on shore!

Q: Why did the girl have problems swimming?
A: She didn't have boy-ancy! (Buoyancy)

Q: Why can male elephants swim whenever they want?
A: They always have trunks with them!

Q: What race is never run?
A: A swimming race.

Q: What kind of fish can't swim?
A: A dead one.

Q: What is a whale's favourite stroke?
A: Blubber-fly!

Q: What detergent do swimmers use to wash their wet suit?
A: Tide!

Q: Did you hear about the slow swimmer?
A: He could only do the crawl.

Q: Where do ghosts like to go swimming?
A: Lake Eerie

Q: Where do zombies like to go swimming?
A: The Dead Sea

Q: What kind of swimmer makes a good gardener?
A: One with great seed times!

Q: What do a dentist and a swim coach have in common?
A: They both use drills!

Q: What kind of exercises are best for a swimmer?
A: Pool-ups!

Q. In which direction does a chicken swim?
A. Cluck-wise!

Q: Why should you never swim on a full stomach?
A: Because it's easier to swim in water!

Q: How do people swimming in the ocean say Hi to each other?
A: They Wave!

Q: What stroke do sheep enjoy doing?
A: The baaaackstroke!

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